Wednesday, July 2, 2008

Announcement


First off, the busty blonde to the right is a friend of mine. She was a Luvabull a year ago, and now she models all over the place. Nevermind the Ben Wallace shirt. Oh, you didn't notice? Good, neither did I.

Second, We wanted to get some different voices on Chicago Bull, so we asked reader/commenter/correcter of my terrible use of the English language Stalkingerinandrews to contribute. StalkingEA will post when he feels like, and today he's a little concerned about Mr. Rose. Take it away, StalkingEA:

A Plea to Derrick Rose

Wow. My first actual blog post. This is such a magical time when a lowly commenter becomes a lowly blogger...Wait, what!? I'm putting myself on Buzz Bissinger's hate list? Does this mean my wife is kicking me out and the only available room is in my parents basement? Crap. Ah, the days of last week when I was just a commenter making wise-ass remarks on various blogs. *sigh* Good times. (Editor's note: for future reference, attempting to be less gay when writing will supremely enhance the quality of your posts. - Noce)

The rest of this post is aimed at Derrick Rose. If anyone can get him to read this, by all means please show it to him.

Derrick, the city of Chicago already loves you, and you haven’t even played a game yet. We all have high hopes for you and the Bulls, and we want you to bring as much success as possible to yourself and Chicago.

That being said, please stay out of any more trouble. Just go to your court date, ask for leniency, and never get on the wrong side of the law again.

We here in the Chicago area have been plagued by star athletes who just can’t stay out of trouble, and we don’t want to see you go down the same path. Scottie Pippen was caught with a gun in his car, Lance Briggs crashed his Lamborghini and ran away, Cedric Benson can’t drive anything motorized while sober, and Tank Johnson’s crimes are too numerous to list here, just to name a few.



While your 106 mph speeding ticket was minor compared to these, nobody wants to see you progress to anything worse. Now, I realize it’s fun to put the hammer down on a machine that will take it, especially out in the country. Hell, I live not too far from where you got stopped. If you really want to come out my way and test the limits of some car, I know stretches of road where the cops won’t be. Just let me know.

But for now, please, PLEASE, just lay low, play some ball, and work on bringing some joy to Chicago and Bulls fans everywhere. Thanks, Derrick, I know you’ll do the right thing.


BallHype: hype it up!

6 comments:

stalkingerinandrews said...

Editor's note: for future reference, attempting to be less gay when writing will supremely enhance the quality of your posts. - Noce

So in other words, don't follow your example?

But seriously, I did attempt a bad joke appealing to blogger stereotypes. Hopefully for everyone, that will be the last time.

stalkingerinandrews said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Dr. C said...

Noce would comment back, but he already posted once this week and he's spent.

Noce said...

I kid because I care...

And that was not all your fault, even if the joke did suck, I just haven't been getting my usual commenter bashing from MBSR because I think Steg and Trunk might have killed Steg's girlfriend and then fled to Mexico.

Gepetto said...

Glad to see you as part of the show, Stalkinger, but I can only wonder where you got your list of Chicago felons...(cough cough)

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