Monday, November 5, 2007

Behold The Power of Purple Jesus

Consider LaDainian Tomlinson John The Baptist, because Purple Jeezy is making miracles happen in Minnesota. As he shred the Bears by foot, not hand, I watched the propecies unfold in front of me. He might have gotten hurt in Oklahoma, but pay no attention. JaMarcus Russell, Calvin Johnson, Joe Thomas, Gaines Adams, Levi Brown and LaRon Landry, all false idols. Nobody fucks with the Jesus. Through 8 games, AD (All Day for those of you who are not in the know..lotta ins, lotta outs, lotta what have yous) has 1,036 yards, putting him on pace for the second best single season record just behind Eric Dickerson's 2,105. Jamal Lewis came the closest to this mark a few years back in 03' when he wound up 39 yards short. Since we last brushed up with the statistics, PJ was averaging 120 yards by hand-off a game. That's up to 130 now. He's still on pace for the 16 tds, and his yardage expectations are up as well.

I could sit here and go on and on, but instead of that, I will leave with some Oklahoma runs as you PJ belittle his opponents. Next week he will feed the entire city of Deerwood, MN with a single piece of toast from Dairy Queen, and they will all be satisfied. By the way, if you happen to be in that direction, do stop by there. For some reason that's the best food I've had from a fast food joint practically ever.

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