Thursday, October 4, 2007

NFL Week Five: Ridin' Dirty




What in the name of Gus Ferotte is going on with the NFL this season? The teams who looked good in the beginning now appear to be dead in the water (Chargers, Bears, Saints) and the teams nobody thought would make any noise (Tampa Bay, Washington, Cleveland) are off to suprisingly good starts. I think a lot of the difference has been due to key injuries and suprise performances from B-list players. Whatever the case, I'm ahead of Dr. C in the leaderboard and I don't plan on relinquishing it anytime soon.

Cleveland @ New England: Cash in those Israel bonds and bet heavily on the Patriots - who have yet to beat any opponent this year by less than three touchdowns. 38-3 Patriots

NY Jets @ NY Giants: The battle in the Big Apple will be interesting as the Jets head into their home stadium as the visiting team. Eric Mangini seems to be in a post-Patriots hangover and the Jets' defense is going to struggle against Derrick Ward and Plaxico Burress. 21-17 Giants

Jacksonville @ Kansas City: The Jags are a 2-point favorite on the road which really means the game is up for grabs. I'll take David Garrad over Damon Huard 9 out of 10 times and this is one of them. 24-17 Jaguars

Atlanta @ Tennessee: I'd put money on Atlanta to do better than the 8 1/2 dogs Vegas is giving them but I'd still take the Titans in this one. 24-17 Titans

Seattle @ Pittsburgh: The Pittsburgh defense is nasty with those zone blitzes and Shaun Alexander is the Kwame Brown of the NFL - get him rattled in the beginning of the game and he'll shy away. 21-14 Steelers

Carolina @ New Orleans: The pressure is on for the Saints if they want to be any sort of contender in their division this year. If they lose and fall to 0-4 they're going to start thinking about how good Darren McFadden would look in gold and black. 28-24 Saints

Arizona @ St. Louis: Marc Bulger's absense will only further the woes for the hapless Rams. Kurt Warner knows all to well what it feels like to light up the Edward Jones Dome. 28-14 Cardinals

Detroit @ Washingtong: The Detroit offense is as good as its defense is bad. The Redskins should be able to run the ball all over the field just like Chicago should have last week if it weren't for Cedric Benson's pussy ass. 27-24 Redskins

Miami @ Houston: No guarantee this week Joey Porter? How'd that work out for ya last week? The Dolphins' defense is brutal and, believe it or not, Houston is pretty good - even if they do have the worst team name in the NFL. 21-10 Texans

Tampa Bay @ Indianapolis: I need somewhere near three interceptions and a forced fumble from the Colts' defense if I have any chance on winning this week in my fantasy league. The Colts are going to need a big game from their defense too with Joseph Addai and Marvin Harrison less than 100%. 24-17 Colts

Baltimore @ San Francisco: Trent Dilfer against the team he took to the Super Bowl? How can you stay away from this game? The Ravens would be wise to give Willis McGahee the ball about 30 times in this one - if they do he'll carry them to a victory. 20-13 Ravens

San Diego @ Denver: Norv Turner is really working on cementing his reputation as the worst NFL coach ever and I think he'll pad the resume again this week with some crappy calls and more bad hair. God I hate NFL coaches named Turner...23-21 Broncos

Chicago @ Green Bay: Dr. C jumped off the Bears bus because he's tired of getting hurt when they lose. I, however, am a glutton for punishment and are sticking with Da Bears in this one because I think they're going to pull this one out. I hate you Brett Favre - retire already you son of a bitch. 20-17 Bears

Dallas @ Buffalo: How long will the Bills ride the Trent Edwards Experience? My guess is after he throws about two picks and gets sacked 7-8 times this week he'll happily re-take the clipboard and go back on the sidelines. 27-13 Cowboys

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